Nikkia Jelleff-Updated Testimony

I came to A Ray of Hope 6 years ago, last month. When I arrived at Peggy’s House, I had just completed 7 months of residential treatment for drug addiction. My children were in foster care and had been for about a year at this point. They moved into Peggy’s house and were home with me permanently on 8/1/2020. I had finally achieved the main goal I had set for myself the day I walked into treatment. My husband was still in active use, and although I was so incredibly excited to have my kid’s home with me, there was a piece of my heart aching because we were missing an important piece of our family. My kids were very happy to be home but after a few weeks, when the excitement had faded, they were upset. Where’s Dad? I was struggling with feeling like I had let the kids down again because he wasn’t here. I was becoming depressed and it showed. Everyone around me could see it. Rachelle recognized what was happening with me and encouraged me to counsel with Dave and regularly attend bible study. It was at this time, feeling pretty hopeless that my family would ever be whole again, Dave and Rachelle guided me into getting to know the Lord. It was the best thing that ever could have happened. It had felt as though Joe was the only missing piece but it turned out the bigger piece was Jesus that my family was missing. Once I let the Lord in, my hopelessness disappeared. I was feeling pretty good about things and was leaving the future of my family in the Lord's hands. It was a few weeks later when my husband showed up on the porch of Peggy’s House ready to get sober. The joy my family felt when he came home was not measurable, but we still had a rough road ahead. Early recovery is messy and most often not pretty but, after all we had overcome and now having Jesus with us we made it through that next year. When Joe and the kids were all home, I thought we had finally made it and the hard stuff was over. It would be smooth sailing from here. In reality, what I came to find was that it was just the closing of a chapter in our lives and the beginning of a new one. A new chapter with all of its own struggles that stemmed from the last.

 It was during that first year that A Ray of Hope had a change in staff and Rachelle needed an assistant to help with all that was on her plate. I started working in the office with her and helping with the day to day of running Peggy’s House. Rachelle had lived and worked on site for many years and about a year later had decided it was time for her family to live off site. This opened the opportunity for my family to move into the basement of Peggy’s House and I could now manage Peggy’s House. It was an amazing opportunity for me to be able to work from home and still be available for my children. As time went on and I found myself helping and supporting moms who were coming through the doors in the same or similar situations I had come in, I found purpose in everything my family had gone through. I understood the thoughts and feelings these moms were going through. I understood how hard it was dealing with the guilt we moms hold from our mistakes. I understood deeply how hard it was to deal with the big emotions our kids have once they come home. Being able to connect with, relate to, and help these moms navigate this hard road has been so rewarding. Although my family has now moved out of Peggy’s House, I still manage the home and help as many moms as I can. I find so much joy in it. The Lord truly took the darkest time of my life, which was meant for evil, and turned it for good.

My family continues to have bumps in the road and every step of the way A Ray of Hope (Dave, Tom, & Rachelle especially) have stood by our side and supported us through it all. I really don’t know what would have happened to my family if we hadn’t found A Ray of Hope and Jesus, but I am so thankful we did. I hope A Ray of Hope is able to continue to be a blessing to so many for years to come!